LEE MEICHAN
221289; ;*
student; ;*
Radin Mas, Clementi Town, Ngee Ann Polytechnic; ;*
singapore; ;*
hotmail • friendster •
I promise to hand my heart over to someone who genuinely cares.
And someone who will handle it with care because it's fragile.
4:47 PM
I need to quit this bad habit of mine and that is
.
11:30 AM
over the past 4-5 months since July to now, often phrases such as,
why must I go through all these?
If I have a choice, can I just let go?
if this is part of growing up, can I say no to it?
why is there a need to go through this?
why must I suffer these?
kept floating through my mind.
Encouragement goes,
Meichan, you're a fighter, why let go when you have hung on there for so long?
don't give up, I'm sure you can!
tell yourself, you can do it!
Tell yourself you can make
Answers like,
What if I say I don't want to grow up?
What if I say I don't want to try any more?
Why must I hang on there when I obviously can't any more?
what if this is not what I want?
I don't want any more, I don't want to continue any more.
What if I don't want to make it anymore?
what if i can't hang on anymore?
if hanging on there is so difficult, maybe give up is a better opinion.
are answers that I kept giving myself.
I begin to question.
I even question GOD.
God where are you? why have you forsaken me? why have you leave me in the lurch and see me all torn and crumpled all by myself?if this is what you want for me, then where are you? Why are you not guiding me?
After several months of struggling,
God I know, you are preparing me.
Preparing me for the better one.
Often, it's not a choice given or chosen but it is a process.
A process that everyone needs to go through but it's a matter of time
Sometimes you are delayed where you are because God knows there is a storm where you are headed. Trust his timing.
Dear GOD, Continue to craft me into your PERFECT PLAN with your PERFECT TIMING!
Lastly, KENNY,
I want to thank you.
Thank you for leaving me at the time when I needed most support and lending shoulder.
Thank you for leaving me so harshly without even having your head turn back and look at me for just once.
Thank you for leaving me when I was at my hardest time.
Thank you for not showing a word of concern despite know shits that I had to gone through in my life.
Thank you for founding a girlfriend so fast because that makes moving on fast and quicker.
And of course, thank you for all the precious memories that you've given me. Though it may be short, but I'm sure we both had a great time and enjoyed the companionship that we both need.
Be it if I was just a passer by who fill in the gap, or you had really fall for me or treated me like a substitute of Alicia, but still thank you for all the meticulous thoughts. goodbye my lovable friend.
2:21 AM
